A series of unfortunate events

[Edit: 18 Oct, 5.30am] 

I've exported this video so many times I can't even remember. And each export takes about 2 hours. Can't really be bothered to check the final cut because it's 17 mins long. Oh well. Whew. Glad this is over and hope the client likes it. <3 

[Edit: 18 Oct, 5am] 

Still exporting my video and hoping it isn’t too late. Sigh. haven’t slept in a long while. So many things on next week I wanna die T.T 

I tried but I can't say I'm not mad. I'm not very mad just a little upset because I tried to tell myself miracles do not happen. And that was a miracle. 

Also, lost my wallet today even though I went back to get it within 15 minutes. Bloody hell. Luckily Bae was there to save me if not I would have cried. Funny how when people ask me why I'm not crying it makes my tears retreat. I was really terrified though. 

[Edit: 17 Oct, 10.30am] 

Done with dental and currently seated at bus feeling extremely hungry but I’m just here to leech the WiFi. A little anxious because I have 7% left and I’m uploading it onto google drive so she can see a preview. Talking nonsense because empty stomach makes the most noise. I made that up. I read an article earlier about how love is being in a calm and peaceful journey and not one that makes your heart race and stomach churn. I think it’s kind of blissful and maybe everyone defines love differently. But I know everyone wants a little of everything. Even if you say you choose a calm version of love, you’ll say they’re boring after a few months and vice versa. I’m just trying to convince myself I don’t like anyone hehe okay yeah I don’t. 30MB and 6% to go, we can do this McCartney(name of my laptop in case you don’t already know)! 

Does CBTL at Bugis+ have power points? 

[Edit: 17 Oct, 9.20am]

Not done with my client’s video but exporting it anyway for a preview. Sigh. I love video work but I hate if it’s rushed. Especially since I have two huge presentations and 2 submissions next week. Still not in a good mood sigh. At the dentist now and she’s late again hehe. I like to think smart people are always late hahaha. Am hungryyy. Gonna find a CBTL to camp at to get WiFi and finish up my work and send it off so I can get the other 50% of my pay teehee. Both my laptop and phone have 50% life left I hope the exporting will be done soooonnnn. Craving for macs oops. 

[Edit: 17Oct, 2.30am]

Started today pretty badly in the afternoon and things didn't get any better. It doesn't matter whether you believe that one thing in the morning can ruin your day or not, and good for you if it doesn't, but I've tried to make myself believe that one person cannot simply ruin your entire day and it still did. Countless times. I guess it just spirals on. One small thing can change your positive perspective into a negative one and what you would normally deem as something neutral suddenly becomes offensive to you that day. Even though my day started at 4pm (in my defence I went to bed at 9am) it still sort of ruined the rest of the day for me. I was more irritable than usual.

When you're upset and don't want to show it, what do you do? 
Tell yourself that you're not entitled to anything in the world, 
that you're not worth that much to others as much as you think, 
that you're just a small speck in the universe. 
Tell yourself that nobody owes you anything, 
and you're lucky people even acknowledged you in the first place. 
Because when you make yourself smaller than people made you, you can't be upset and you have to show gratitude.